U.N. poised to vote on whether to invade ‘Bongo Bongo Land’

Following UKIP MP Godfrey Bloom’s comments about how the government of ‘Bongo Bongo Land’ was spending all Britain’s foreign aid on bikini waxing, lip gloss and sushi, the United Nations have discovered a even bigger threat from the country which exists somewhere just outside everyone’s field of vision and possibly in Alf Garnet’s head.

According to a leaked report that was found on Wikipedia, Bongo Bongo Land has been producing weapons of mass destruction, with the overall aim to use them on nice, normal people – like us. The U.N. investigated further by running the country’s name through Youtube and came up with a video which showing a man chanting in front of a building which looks like a mud hut, but could also be a nuclear missile silo, meaning they’re definitely up to something.

Although official U.N. protocol states that weapons inspectors have to actually physically assess a country’s threat before an offensive air strike can take place, friend of U.N. weapons inspector, Kevin Peters, was quoted as saying, “As I have never been there, nor can I find it on Google Earth, they are clearly not allowing my mate’s team to do their jobs, so let’s get them.”

Reaction was equally hostile from every American interviewed, each one repeating the same ‘Predator-inspired’ statement of, “If they bleed, we can kill them.”

British Prime Minister, David Cameron, has denied that Britain will be dragged into a full-scale war with Bongo Bongo Land, adding, “Unless of course America says we have to.”


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